Friday Feels + Why I’ve Been MIA

honest

Hey Hello Hi…

Hey friends, Happy Fri-YAY!!
It’s been a while, I know I know, but let me explain. It seems kind of crazy really. I re-branded, changed the name, launched a new website, and then I disappeared from writing and I’m so sorry about that. I still maintain my presence on Instagram and it has grown immensely. I’m so grateful for that but for the past several months it has been beyond difficult. Instagram isn’t real life. I can’t stress this enough. Having an aesthetically pleasing feed doesn’t mean my life is perfect. It’s far from that and it’s been a nice cover from reality. Honestly, I don’t really know where to start. There’s been a lack of content on the blog big time but it’s just been too overwhelming every time I sit down to write anything. I end up just staring at the blank screen in a bit of disbelief and feeling uninspired. I’ve been wanting to write this post for so long but can’t get myself through it. Several blogger friends that I love have finally opened up about some honest, real life hardships they have been going through that no one knew about and it has helped me to finally have the courage to finish this post.

So where to begin…

Well what many people don’t really know, (main reason why I’ve been so quiet), over the last year my mom has been and still is battling cancer. It’s been a really tough, stressful, emotional year and the last few months just really took a toll on me mentally and physically. Having to deal with everything that’s been going on like the multiple surgeries that she’s gone through, to the complications, to bad doctors, and a five month long staph infection. It has been the hardest year on my entire family and it still isn’t over. I have stayed strong on the phone with my mom telling her it will all be ok so many times and then immediately after hanging up, I burst into tears.

The thought has come to my mind so many times. What if it will NOT be ok? I’m not ready to lose my mom. What will we do?

I have no answers to those questions. I hope and pray everyday that it will be OK. There isn’t much else I can do right now. I hope you can now understand why it’s been so hard for me to sit down and write anything besides CANCER SUCKS and CANCER, I HATE YOU.

Let’s be honest…

I’ve been trying to keep it in for so long. It’s definitely taking a toll on my writing and I feel like I should just be honest and share that with you. Over the last few months life has been a lot better. I moved to a new apartment, was able to take a couple trips, and really refresh and refocus. There will be a lot of new content coming to the blog very soon along with a few surprises. I appreciate the support so so very much and all the kind words from those of you that knew about the struggle. The social media community is just so amazing to me and I’ve been able to connect with people I would have never known if it wasn’t for the power of social media. Everything looks so fun and happy on Instagram and I try to stay positive but sometimes I just want to give up. Luckily I have an amazing network of friends that have been so supportive and continue to tell me everyday how awesome I’m doing and I love you all for it. 

honest

What’s next…

Now I don’t want you guys to pity me. I just wanted to be honest and in hopes of me sharing this maybe somebody else can find some comfort and solace. Maybe it will help somebody that has been going through something hard to reach out and talk about it, because that was the hardest thing for me to do. Being the oldest of three kids, I felt a lot of the burden fall on me which I was happy to take. Little did I realize how much it would and did effect me. Just letting it all out was so necessary to get to a better place mentally. Keeping in so much is never good and it’s something I still really need to work on.

Honest talk, I’ve been doing meditation every night before bedtime and it has helped immensely. Also setting aside some time after work to talk with the hubs has forced me to deal with it. I can’t thank that man enough.♡

So now that I’ve talked your ears off, I’m done now and I want to start fresh. Today is September 1st. The beginning of a new month and a new season too. With every new season I welcome the change and hope it will bring new joys and inspiration.

 

honest

Friday Fun…

So now that I have gotten all of that off my chest, lets get to the fun stuff! This weekend is Labor Day and the “official” last hoorah of summer. How is this possible already? This summer really did fly by more so than it has in the past. Anybody else feel the same? I’m going to add a ton of great links for you guys to make sure you have an amazing weekend even if you aren’t going or doing something extravagant. Nothing wrong with a BBQ with friends and family. I’ll be doing just that and sitting by the pool with a glass of rosé. Cheers to an amazing weekend everyone! 🙂

  • A list of 25 amazing rosé wines to try if you don’t know which one to get by now
  • Check out all the sales this weekend from you favorite brands. Literally every store will have a sale going on
  • If you need a great pair of sandals, I highly recommend these! I live in them and wore my last pair for 3 years 
  • If you need a fun floaty for the weekend, check these out.
  • Looking for a last minute swimsuit? My favorite ones are from here.
  • If you are in the NYC area and need a close getaway check out this list.
  • Check out this list of new books to read.
  • Also don’t forget the sunscreen! COOLA is my absolute favorite. 

 

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6 Replies to “Friday Feels + Why I’ve Been MIA”

  1. Beautiful post. My mom has been battling cancer as well. Those women are 10x stronger than we ever imagined huh. Love this blog even more. Its real. Its sincere. Its why i keep visiting. One of my bookmarks. People, do the same!!! Love and support for your whole family.

    1. Thank you so much for the support Alex, it means more than you can imagine. It’s such an awful disease and sucks when we can’t do anything to help them. Stay strong too friend 🙂 xoxo

  2. I lost my dad to cancer when I was 18. The words “cancer sucks” never feel strong enough to describe how truly terrible the disease is, but what else can you say about a disease that causes someone you love to melt away before your eyes? How does one go on living everyday life when you know every day could be the last semi-normal day of your life?
    I’ve missed reading your page but I’m so glad you’ve taken the time away to be with family! It sounds like your mum has a wonderful and strong support system and it sounds like your husband is exactly who you need next to you right now.
    I’m always just a DM away babe. Sending you a million and one hugs!

    1. Thank you so much Kait. It does suck and there is no other way of saying. I’m sorry this terrible disease took your dad away. It’s really just terrible. Thank you for reading and supporting. Love xoxo

  3. Much love and prayers to you and your mother during this overwhelming time. I admire you sharing your heart.

    1. Thank you so much 🙂

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